The Single Sky
Your personal Astrological Intimacy Profile
TEXT by STEVEN & JODIE FORREST
Programmed by Astrologer, Alphee Lavoie
& Sergei Tarasov,
Life without love feels empty. That's one of those ancient human truths that almost no one can escape. Let's immediately emphasize that "love" in this context doesn't translate into the relatively narrow ghetto of "sexual love" or even "committed relationships." We're talking about the far broader human arena of friendship and caring, talking and listening, supporting, sharing, laughing together -- whatever outward form the love may take. People without "partners" can be perfectly content and complete; they can lead full, happy, meaningful lives. But people without love live in shadowland.
The deeper the love, the richer -- and more difficult -- it must be. Certainly love's difficulties and rewards are generally most pressing when two people love each other bodily, psychologically, and spiritually, under one roof. Marie's ability to be happy in that high-stakes environment depends basically on his getting two things right: the first is being clear about who he really is and what he really needs in that department. The second lies in simply choosing the right person -- and, as many a brokenhearted soul will attest, that is far from being the easiest part! In both of those areas, astrology can provide many insights. We'll explore many of them in the pages that follow. While we will emphasize the dynamics that arise between lovers, a lot of what we say will also apply (with a little creative translation!) to "lower voltage" human connections, such as friendships, familial connections, even professional associations.
THE HEART OF THE MATTER
No astrological connection between two people is so inherently dreadful that enough patience, love and determination cannot only make it last, but make it something precious to both of them. At the same time, there is no kind of astrological connection so wonderful that enough selfishness, confusion about sex, or plain immaturity cannot turn it into a nightmare. That's the heart of the matter, and it underlies every word you are about to read. This isn't just some squirmy attempt on our parts to escape responsibility for any errors we might make -- it's a recognition of Marie's miraculous capacity to love, to live consciously and creatively, and to take responsibility for himself. The power is not in hands of the planets; it's in his own hands, and we want to honor that.
Still, the planetary patterns at Marie's birth do reflect certain needs and potential blind spots in his nature. Understanding them can empower him to make better decisions about what -- and who -- is important to him. We'll start with an analysis of Marie's birthchart from a relationship perspective. Then, in the second part of the report, we'll focus on what his chart tells us about the nature of his natural partners in this world.
CUTTING TO THE CHASE
Too many books and theories about relationships assume that the same answers work for everybody. And of course that's not true. Passionate folks need a different kind of relationship than do more detached or laid back ones. Some people are very domestic by nature; others wither unless they have more breathing room or a less traditional bond with each other. Our first step then is to explore Marie as an individual. Who exactly is he, independently and as an individual? Let's dive right into that question astrologically.
Marie's astrological profile
What follows is a thumbnail sketch of Marie, focusing on the parts of his character that are most relevant to questions of sex, love, and intimacy. Later we'll explore the kind of person with whom he could be happiest in the long run.
The center of the astrological universe is always the Sun. There is something to which Marie must be true if he is going to be authentically real, psychologically centered, and fully committed to life. Astrology is a lot more complicated than Sun Signs, but we can never leave them out of the picture. The Sun is what holds the solar system together, and it holds all the different voices in Marie's psyche together the same way.
When Marie was born, the all-important Sun was in the Sign Aries, the Warrior. Marie has a fierce capacity for loyalty, and expects it back. Like a warrior, he prefers honesty and directness, without a lot of frou-frou. There is an elevated need for shared experiences of extremity, adventure and intensity, and if the relationship does not offer enough of them, Arian energy can easily turn tense and edgy, even combative. A great intimate art for Marie, one upon which the viability of relationships depends, is to make sure he is fighting about what he is actually mad about -- there's a risk, in other words, of expressing the energies of sexual frustration in the form of what appears to be a stupidly inflated argument over politics. Still, Marie brings many wonderful qualities to the table: the warrior's ability to make strong vows and keep them, a fierce devotion to truth, and a grand quality of aliveness.
The Houses of the birthchart are just a way of indicating where a planet was physically in sky when a person was born -- rising, overhead, down below the horizon somewhere. Symbolically, they're just as important as Signs. At the time of Marie's first breath, the Sun was in the Eighth House, which suggests a quality of intensity, passion, and depth in Marie's character, and underlying that, a deep tidal flow of energy, drives, and images welling up from the buried, taboo, instinctual realms of the human psyche. Quite a stew! This is always a touchy subject because, while Marie does need to guard against becoming simply moody, withdrawn, or "too complicated,", we must also respect a few legitimate facts about him: he feeds his spirit with that kind of pensive, solitary reflection, and without it, his energy would be sapped. He also possesses a genuine need for emotionally-charged, unflinching connection with a few dear souls in this world. And no one who really loves or even understands him is going to be too quick to interpret those parts of his character in terms of his being "demanding" or full of "unreasonable, unfathomable emotional needs." One unmistakable bottom line is that Marie gets along most easily with other people who have a similarly profound, passionate orientation and with whom he can exchange these mysterious, ancient energy-sacraments. Such people are thus not inclined to be too judgmental about his lack of some requisite "appropriateness" or "perspective." What a more shallow, self-controlled kind of person might perceive as emotional excess on Marie's part, a deeper soul might see as refreshing honesty.
The Moon, in a nutshell, is the heart. One could describe it as the "mood" of a person's life. It's connected to whatever makes us happy -- what feeds or nourishes us emotionally. It's always at least a little bit irrational, and yet if we don't take care of the Moon, we tend to be in a chronic lousy mood and to be hard not only on ourselves, but also on the people around us. Needless-to-say, a reasonably healthy Moon-function is absolutely essential to intimacy, for one simple reason: if we are not taking care of our Moons, were not even intimate with ourselves, and that puts severe limits on our ability to be intimate with anyone else.
When Marie was born, the Moon was passing through the Sign Leo, which has always been associated with a strong drive toward vibrant self-expression, and with all the ancient archetypes of royalty. Consistent with that kind of picture, the mood of Marie's life is one of colorfulness, a desire to be seen, heard and taken seriously, and an endless, generous celebration of all that is truly wonderful in himself and -- equally -- in those upon whom he bestows his love. Intimate life with such a grand soul promises to be an uplifting experience, bigger than life, and full of deep support and encouragement. Those advantages might be balanced by certain less attractive propensities in Marie of which he may not be fully aware: a certain defensiveness regarding the less "noble" dimensions of his own nature, a penchant for what may be perceived as haughtiness, and a certain vulnerability toward acts of unintentional selfishness. He doesn't have to be a living, breathing illustration of all that potentially arrogant Leo Moon material -- but avoiding it requires that he be willing to see himself reflected in the mirror of love...which is to say that he listens to the observations of those who care about him, and makes certain "chiropractic adjustments" in his character.
The Moon was also in the Twelfth House of the birthchart, suggesting that the central reigning need for Marie is the drive to experience something transcendent. This deep-seated spiritual hunger is one of the most central and basic features of his character. He is a natural mystic, and has probably had a variety of psychic experiences. His mental wellbeing is enhanced enormously if he allows a bit of time each day simply to sit in silence -- call it prayer or meditation...or call it just sitting, no matter. Failing that, he could attempt to make up the "Spirit deficit" through some pattern of escapism -- or Spirit Itself could arrange little "reminders" in the forms of sudden misfortunes, reversals, or losses. However we look at him, we must recognize that Marie is a person with a real sense of magic about him -- able to sense layers of reality that lie just beyond the grasp of our normal senses and the prisons they weave around our souls.
Sun and Moon are like head and heart, but there's a third factor that's almost as important. It's the Ascendant, which is simply the Sign that was dawning in the east at the instant of birth. Quite simply, it represents how you "dawn" on people: it's your style, the way you present yourself. At the time of Marie's birth, Virgo was rising over the eastern horizon of Magdeburg 52N0700 11.., and thus he wears the "Mask of the Craftsperson." As that archetypal image implies, there's a competent, grounded, responsible vibration around him, full of intimations of skill, effectiveness, and an urge to be helpful.
The Ascendant works like a colored filter through which the light of the rest of the chart shines, so all Marie's interior processes and drives are given this supportive Virgonian "spin" as they are expressed -- he's careful, meticulous, and eager to discourse in great detail about whatever subject is at hand. More than Marie likely realizes, people tend to think of him in intellectual, talkative terms. That's not his actual intention or ultimate nature, but his painstaking, precise outward style may create that effect...and the quality of Marie's intimate life benefits from a little reflection on the price of that phenomenon. At the same time, we need to add that anyone trying to be close to him offers Marie a tender gift by learning patiently to hear what are often unerringly accurate appraisals of emotional realities -- his own or that of his partners -- behind the occasional long-windedness of his style.
Everybody's chart contains all the planets, but sometimes a given planet really stands out as particularly definitive for that individual. One of the simplest and most powerful ways a planet can attain that kind of prominence is just by being lined up closely with any of the three big factors we've looked at already -- in a "conjunction," that is, with the Sun, Moon, or Ascendant. Another way is for the planet to be "the Ruler of the Ascendant," which is simply a way of saying that the planet has a special relationship with the Sign that was rising when you were born. Investigating those possibilities, here's what we find in Marie's case:
No planets were aligned with the Sun at the instant of Marie's birth, so we must seek elsewhere in his chart for our clues.
Probing, intense Pluto is aligned with the Moon in Marie's birthchart: his very instincts are those of a psychoanalyst or a private detective..."suspicious," in other words. In a sense that's the right word -- Marie is "suspicious" that whatever he sees, the truth is more multifaceted, that behind every sane, well-adjusted face there beats a complex, psychologically-charged heart, that the line between sanity and madness is blurrier than most of us would prefer to think. He just can't feel comfortable unless the state of a relationship -- or the individual souls of both people involved -- are being questioned and probed. That's not everybody's cup of tea, of course. No one who is grossly uncomfortable with psychological or emotional honesty is going to be able to stay in the ring for long with Marie, and such a person probably shouldn't even try. With that said and respected, let's add one more point: Marie, in the immortal words of Sigmund Freud, needs to remember that sometimes a cigar is just a cigar.
When Marie was born, no planet was actually rising, but all is not lost! Our next stop will be a consideration of which planet was RULING the Ascendant.
Mercury is the "ruler" of Marie's Ascendant. When we look for it in his birthchart, we find it in the Seventh House. That emphasizes a strong quality of empathy in his nature, a real capacity to "put himself in the other guy's shoes" -- clearly a useful trait when it comes to the "negotiations" that are inevitably a part of any adult relationship. If anything, Marie needs to be careful about getting so "tuned into" his partner's needs that he forgets to be clear about his own.
One cannot talk long about the astrology of love without bumping into the Goddess of Love herself: Venus. There's an unfortunate tendency to "feminize" Venus, but a casual glance at any man's birthchart will reveal a startling fact: males possess this planet too! Robbing men of it is old-fashioned sexism, pure and simple. Still, Venus is connected with a lot of behaviors that have traditionally been allotted socially more to women than to men: tenderness, romantic drives, the urge to make oneself attractive, how we go about the delicate art of "arranging to be caught."
When Marie was born, Venus was in the Sign Pisces. In affairs of the heart, Marie is sensitive, imaginative and easily moved. Pisces is the Mystic, and with Venus there, Marie responds to a sense of ethereal, intangible connectedness between two spirits, to a quality of relating that goes beyond our more ego or personality-driven definitions of ourselves. In courtship, Attila the Hun and hard-core rationalists need not apply. Marie sees relating as a way to transcend this plane, enter an altered state, and experience both himself and the mate as something beyond how the evening news or the IRS would define them. Nothing kills Marie's romantic feelings faster than either cynicism or the partner's attempts to block Marie's flights of fancy or meditative practice. It was also in the Sixth House, which suggests that Marie's appealing Venusian energies flourish wherever he feels competent, useful and appreciated. This doesn't mean proficiency only at a paid job, although the right work, possibly involving people-smarts and/or creativity, can go a long way towards bolstering Marie's sense of attractiveness. So can a harmonious work environment--a tense one could wear him down and rob him of energy better spent on a primary relationship. With Venus in the House of craftsmanship, the development of relating skills--poise, consideration, generosity, helpfulness--should be taken to a high art. A key point for Marie, however, is not to overdo--it's the House of craftsmanship, not servitude. Another less than optimal manifestation of Marie's Sixth House Venus might be all style and no substance: to substitute all the right moves and endless "doing for" someone for genuine, look-you-in-the-eye intimacy. A higher road involves staying with the rich gift that Marie brings to the couple: his deep and attentive desire to improve both the relationship and his skills at it.
If Venus has been overly feminized over the centuries, certainly Mars has been overly masculinized. Here's the "War God" -- a symbol of the heat of your blood, your intensity, and your healthy animal desires. It's passionate and unabashedly sexual. While Venus represents the tender contact of eyes and hearts, Mars is centered a little farther south in the human anatomy.
In Marie's chart, Mars lies in the Sign Taurus. The flow of Marie's sexual energy is earthy, leisurely, calm and usually rather silent, seeking not only pleasure but comfort. For him, passion is best nurtured by keeping things simple and letting them happen instead of forcing them in any way. At best, there's a matter-of-fact sensuality, naturalness and lack of inhibitions to his erotic style. Sometimes every couple has to deal with difficulties in their union, but Marie is turned off by unnecessary drama, complexities, game-playing and endless discussions of the relationship. However, it might be important to learn when some processing really is necessary, or Marie may simply withdraw or look elsewhere. He has a strong instinctual side, and would relish the opportunity to let it act according to its own innate rhythms and wisdom. How? By getting all of the senses involved, not just one or two. Above all, by truly listening to the body and, given half a chance, Marie excels at that. It was also in the Ninth House, where its fiery energy becomes associated with Marie's hunger to stretch out experientially, to see new places and things, and generally to pack life full of exotic events. He is emphatically not a person who would take well to a prison sentence -- or to any other form of cloistered, constrained existence. The urge for the "open road" is in his bones, and far horizons fill his eyes. Since Mars is about passion, an inordinate hunger for sexual variety is sometimes associated with this configuration, but it's best to understand that as a less-conscious expression of the potentials. This planetary position can be quite consistent with happy monogamy -- but only if the partner is someone in whom there flows some of that same wandering blood.
Classically, the Seventh House of the birthchart is called "The House of Marriage." Any planet or planets there give us insight into the nature of our most natural partners and friends in life -- a subject we'll explore thoroughly a little later in the report. Such planets also tell us something very significant about what we need to learn and where we need to grow if our intimate life isn't going to read like a gossip column -- or the obituaries.
When Marie was born, Mercury, the "Messenger of the Gods," was low in the western sky and therefore in the Seventh House, making vigorous, eager communication a central, essential theme in all his truly close relationships. At one level, Marie is skilled here, with a particularly elevated ability to frame words and ideas in a way that is custom-designed to work well for whoever is listening. On a deeper level, the key for Marie's longevity in commitments lies in maintaining intellectual interest in his partner -- and that in turn depends absolutely upon his cultivating an eternal willingness to listen freshly, to expect surprises, and above all never to "finish other people's sentences for them." That may seem to be a minor breach of etiquette, but with Mercury in the Seventh, it's a far more serious than it seems. If Marie does that, he has stopped really listening. He has begun to imagine that he knows what his partner is going to say. Right or wrong, that's the beginning of a kind of self-created mental boredom, which quickly kills the very roots of love for anyone with the "Lord of Words" in the House of Love. From the evolutionary perspective, it's really all about listening -- and giving the partner half a chance to BE interesting.
Everybody older than twelve knows the meaning of the words "chemistry" and "electricity" in the context of sexual attraction, but they are notoriously difficult to define -- or predict. We've all met people who seemed utterly inappropriate as partners for us, but there was "just something about those eyes..." Sometimes of course that's a signal to catch the next shuttle for Alpha Centauri, but other times it's a reminder that, as sexual beings, we are inheritors of an ancient and mysterious biological legacy, and while we perhaps shouldn't let those instincts run our lives uncritically, a relationship that lacks that certain undefinable quality of compelling passion might not have the oomph to get us through those inevitable threadbare patches on the road of love. Astrologically, these matters are reflected in the Eighth House of the birthchart. It describes your "natural lover" -- a notion we'll investigate in detail later on -- and also the qualities you must develop in yourself in order fully to inhabit your primordial, instinctual sexuality.
In Marie's case see above.
Human relationships are precisely twice as complicated as individual human beings. We'd like to complete our investigation of Marie's intimacy profile in a graphic way with a series of scales that compare him to the average human being in a variety of categories. Let's emphasize that there's no special virtue in scoring "average" in every category. Extremes here aren't unhealthy -- just strongly individual!
Our first Scale is called "Centrality of the Relationship Drive." What we're getting at here is just how important the urge toward intimacy is for Marie both from a psychological perspective and also from the viewpoint of the evolutionary needs of his soul.
Next, the Need for Psychosexual Intensity. This isn't to be confused with how often Marie wants to "do it!" What we're looking at here is the drive toward deep, almost scary eye contact and the exchange of strong, primal emotions. This kind of fire isn't everyone's cup of tea, but for those who need it, living without it can feel like a walking death sentence.
Our "Capacity for Conflict" Scale reflects the fact that all relationships involve friction at times. Some people are more comfortable with the expression of anger than are others. There is no ultimate right or wrong in this, but if two people are very far apart on this scale, there are some obvious challenges in terms of finding effective ways of communicating their frustrations with each other.
"Domesticity" is word that conjures up boring images of Dagwood and Blondie Bumstead. That's not what we mean here at all. Some people are naturally oriented strongly toward homelife -- quiet evenings spent reading, meals shared, family feelings, caring for the physical home and enhancing its beauty and comfort.
Next, we come to our "Flirtatiousness" Scale -- and please don't take this as an indicator of infidelity! As any sexually sophisticated person knows, part of what puts the sparkle in our eyes is the sexual or romantic awareness that people have of each other in safe social contexts. Of course, some of us are more "flirtatious" than others. Serious differences between people on this scale could lead to a lot of tension, insecurity, and argument. How does Marie look in this department?
"Need For Verbal Communication." What about talking things out? Some people need to put everything into words in order to feel close and connected. Others are comfortable with silent understandings. Here's how it looks for Marie
"Need for Solitude and Privacy." Love is wonderful, but we all need some time alone too. How central is the drive for solitude and privacy for Marie?
"Need for Autonomy and Independence." Relationships always involve compromise and joint decisions. Some people find that surrendering of absolute authority over their own lives easier than do others. How strong is Marie's need for autonomy and independence?
"Need for Stability and Security." Solidity, reliability, and predictability in the relationship area have some appeal for almost everyone, but they sometimes must be paid for in terms of spontaneity, freedom, and serendipity. How strong is Marie's need for stability and security in the relationship?
"Need for Emotional Expression." People can talk about their needs and drives reasonably and logically, and that's necessary sometimes. But what we're getting at here is the fact that some people need to experience their partner's emotions more directly and also to express their own inner states in less cognitive, more primordial ways -- tears, touch, tone of voice. Where is Marie on that scale of human possibilities?
This completes our preliminary investigation of Marie's relationship dynamics from an astropsychological perspective. It's time now to explore what his chart tells us about his natural partner.
Marie's natural mate
Read enough of those paperbacks about "How to Find the Perfect Relationship" and you might get the idea that if only you could find somebody who'd underlined all the same passages in the book, you'd live happily ever after. But there's something ancient and wise inside all of us that knows better. The "right person" isn't just some walking statistic that agrees with you in every way -- how boring! Choosing a mate is lot more complicated than that dull, deadeningly safe game, and many dimensions of our psyches are involved in making the right choice. We've already investigated some of the more enigmatic parts of that material under the headings of "chemistry" and "electricity." But there's an even deeper mystery here.
Look at any happy, long-lasting relationship (and no jokes about "if you can find one...."). Consider the birthchart of either of the people involved. If you know even a little astrology, you'll make a fascinating discovery: that chart describes not only the person who "owns" it, but the partner as well. It's really pretty amazing -- while you're lying there in your cradle, your chart already describes the individual with whom you may be sharing your life, often in eerie detail...somebody who may not even be aboard the planet yet! One soul-satisfying way of making sense of that fact is to believe that such meetings and relationships are somehow pre-destined...that the notion of "soulmates" isn't totally airheaded, in other words.
Our next step in this analysis is to consider what information Marie's birthchart provides about his natural mate.
Before we start, two comments: "perfect fits" are just as rare in the relationship department as they are in a shoe store -- and, like shoes, a little wear often makes them a lot more comfortable!
The second comment is that what we ask for in a mate is always complex, and often contradictory -- we might spend a long time looking for the perfect "introverted extravert," for example. That brings us back to the scarcity of "perfect fits." In the pages that follow, we are going to try to bring some order into this psychologically chaotic question by dividing up Marie's various needs into a lot of different areas. What turns him on erotically in a person may be different than what allows him to relax and be himself. What entertains him may be different than what he instinctively trusts. All are legitimate desires, of course. Which ones Marie might be most willing to compromise depends on who he is. A lot of our insights into the qualities in a partner without which Marie really can't live are there in the previous pages, where we discussed his personal profile. As we move forward into thinking about the character of Marie's natural partner, our first step is to consider the simple question of...
WHAT KIND OF PERSON HE LIKES
Certain kinds of human beings simply fit Marie's style of living and being, regardless of gender -- folks who would make good roommates, let's say. That may not be the most exciting idea in the world, but it's absolutely essential to two people sharing life sanely and harmoniously, without their emotional circuits frying. Astrologically, the Seventh House -- the traditional House of Marriage -- gives us lots of insight into the kinds of people with whom Marie simply tends to "get along."
One way of exploring this House is to consider which planet "rules its cusp." At the moment of Marie's birth, , Virgo was rising, as we saw earlier. That means that the opposite Sign, Pisces, was on the western horizon - and that's the Seventh House cusp. Now, Pisces is ruled by Neptune, which symbolizes pure consciousness, imagination, and an instinct about the presence of higher levels of reality...and that in turn suggests that individuals with whom Marie can form the most lasting, stable relationships are ones with a deep sense of magic and rich inner lives. This balances his Virgonian vulnerability toward getting bogged down in worry about life's practical details. We are not talking about flaky escapism on the partner's part here, but rather about a healthy sense of life's larger spiritual purpose, an ability to "stop and smell the roses," and a certain softness of heart. Marie needs people who balance him that way, helping him to relax and feel the silence, and thereby to recover from some of the hyper-competence he developed in response to the anxieties he experienced while growing up. Differences, even arguments, may arise and press Marie's critical buttons from time to time in minor ways; that's no big deal. There is, however, one absolute emotional hair-trigger for Marie: a lack of responsibility that impacts the wellbeing the relationship as a whole. Any such failure kills affection faster than a shoe kills a bug. And that, above all, is why these highly loving, tender, empathetic Piscean qualities are so custom-designed to feed the heart of committed love and why they play such a complimentary role in Marie's love-life.
Trying to take it a little further, we learn that when Marie was born,Mercury was in the Seventh House. This tells us that Marie's natural partner in life is motivated by a sizzling degree of mental curiosity. Intellectualism is not the point at all; much closer to the mark is the simple, innocent hunger to encounter new experiences and perceptions -- and to share them. It's a commonplace notion that good communication is important to any relationship; to add that it takes on particular importance for Marie is certainly worth saying. But far more vigorously we emphasize that his natural partner will simply never bore him! Such a person reads, thinks, soaks up new ideas -- and feels a real desire to bounce them off Marie and learn his viewpoints and reactions. The process is mentally rewarding, and also simply fun for both of them. Marie may very well find himself happily bonded to a writer, a teacher, or a person involved with the media -- those are the places his natural soulmates often find themselves.
Ah, but there is more to love than merely "liking" each other! What about...
Here we're not exactly talking about sex -- don't worry, that's next! -- but something less definable and just as important: romance. Maybe a better way to put it is that if a relationship lacks that delightfully mysterious emotional entanglement we call "romance," sex usually doesn't interest us for very long, no matter how physically attractive the person may be. We're getting at some feelings here that are tough to nail down in precise words, but which loom large in the human heart (and human birthchart!) anyway: feelings of fondness and affection, feelings that make our insides fluttery and warm. What kind of person might inspire Marie to "climb the highest mountain, cross the widest sea?" Or, to phrase it the way we did in Junior High School, who strikes him as "cute?"
Unsurprisingly, Venus plays a big part in shaping such romantic responses. When Marie was born, "the Goddess of Love" was in the Sign Pisces the Fish. So, does Marie have a thing for folks with gills? Or who like to swim? Well, the latter point is actually fairly close to the mark, except that the waters into which the Piscean fish dives are the bottomless waters of consciousness itself. Thus, the kinds of people who stimulate Marie romantically and erotically are ones who can make that deep dive with him. They are the natural mystics of the world, the visionary poets, the symbol-readers and dream-interpreters, the fantasy-weavers, the great "imaginers" of the community. Many times they manifest as artists. It's not unusual to see them drawn to religion or depth psychology. For Marie, the single most essential aspect of romantic love is the sharing of consciousness -- quiet time, full of easy eye contact, and a soulful sense of tides of unverbalized understanding flowing between him and his partner. His natural lover understands those pleasant human mysteries, and shares those same ancient, elusive motivations.
Houses are important here too. Marie's Venus lies in the Sixth House, revealing to us that Marie responds romantically to qualities of effectiveness, responsibility, and competence in a partner. Traditionally, the "House of Servants," the Sixth House actually refers to all our various crafts and skills, and to the good feeling that come from exercising them. For Marie, a natural partner is a person who probably possesses a serious calling or craft, whether or not it puts money in anyone's pockets. More importantly, such a person will eagerly and soberly take on the ultimate Venus-craft: the work of slowly building that network of trust, sexual joy, and practical interdependency that supports the working reality of committed adult love.
Romantic feelings are closely tied to the Fifth House of the chart as well. That's the traditional House of "Love Affairs," and has a lot to do with all the sassy, funny, sexy energies that keep the sparkle in people's eyes.
As with the Seventh House, we learn a lot about the Fifth by considering the planet that "rules its cusp." When Marie was born, Capricorn was on the cusp of the Fifth House, which makes Saturn its planetary ruler. For Marie to feel easy about the spontaneous expression of his sexuality, it helps him a lot to have a partner who is mature, solid and grounded, one who can be trusted in all the little details that make or break a human partnership. Saturn energy is traditionally about "control," which is of course antithetical to most spontaneous forms of sexual expression. In this case, while we're not talking about whips and chains, we are looking at a sexual style in which each person takes "control" sometimes -- almost like "taking turns," except not quite that predictable. So, Marie must be able to say what he wants in bed in a direct way, and get it. He must also be able to receive that same kind of explicit directiveness with good grace.
When Marie was born, there were no planets actually located in the Fifth House This doesn't mean that relationship questions are unimportant to Marie -- only that we'd better pay more attention to the material that follows.
Now for the PG portion of our program...
If not absolutely essential to happiness in a relationship, great sex is at the very least a tremendous assistance to it. They don't call it "making" love for nothing! Around our twelfth birthdays, give or take a couple of years, most of us begin to learn exactly how easy it is to trigger those kinds of hot, aroused feelings -- and within a few more years we've learned a more baffling lesson: that they are very difficult to sustain, at least in the context of a long-term monogamous relationship. Whimsical passions are easily found, but what we are about to explore is that much rarer jewel...
Keeping the heat turned on! Some people don't even believe it's possible -- that you inevitably "get over it" and soon settle down to the far more sober realities of arguing over whose turn it is to carry out the garbage. Cynics! Astrology teaches us that sexual energy between two people is in fact sustainable, and that while part of the answer lies inside ourselves (see what we wrote about Marie's "chemistry" and "electricity" themes in the earlier parts of this report), a significant part of keeping sex alive depends on simply choosing our "natural lover" -- a person in whom all the ancient, eternal archetypes of mating and bonding are focused for us. Astrologically, the Eighth House holds many of these secrets. One way of unraveling them is to learn which planet "rules its cusp." In Marie's birthchart, Pisces is on the Eighth House cusp, which puts Neptune in charge as House-ruler. That's the Sign of the "Mystic" or the "Dreamer," so the configuration suggests curious themes of psychic communion, shared imagination, and weird, inexplicable experiences. Marie's natural lover must certainly be a sensitive person and very probably a markedly psychic one, not shy about the expression of spiritual, metaphysical or philosophical perceptions, and deeply aware of the role moments of "merging" play in maintaining erotic interest between embodied souls -- eye-contact in candlelight, shared moments in sacred places, silent moonlit walks. For Marie, an abundance of that kind of experiential spirituality is an essential quality in a partner. Only with that sense of the deeper evolutionary drama between them can he open up the deepest, most primal dimensions of his passion.
At Marie's birth, the Sun was in the Eighth House. We looked at some of what that piece of the puzzle meant for Marie personally earlier in the report. Now we can discover what it tells us about his natural lover. Such a person is of a SOLAR nature, which is to say a distinctive, memorable individual, and one with at least some degree of charisma and presence. Since Marie's own nature is passionate and intense, it follows that his natural mate possesses similar qualities, and is one who can be open to some of the more extreme psychic and emotional places that deep, committed sexual communion can reveal. There are more kinds of "nakedness" than the kind that comes from undoing buttons -- and anyone who has to think twice about what that line means may be a very fine person, but not one qualified to share Marie's bed for very long! Being close to him is rewarding, but it's no job for a wimp.
Finally, we come right down the roots of the matter. Romance, partnership, terrific sex -- when they work their magic on us, they are like three rivers flowing into what is perhaps the most basic and ancient of all human institutions: a sense of having found a home. After a while, given hard work and the Grace of God, couples may come to a place where they can "take each other for granted" -- in a very pleasant, healthy sense of that phrase! No one is going to leave. Trust and commitment are total. And (blessedly!) time spent "working on the relationship" diminishes. Astrologically, these deep feelings of comfort and familiarity are represented by the Moon. We've already considered it from other perspectives, but now, with Marie's Moon in Leo, we can see what light it sheds on this most ancient of human institutions: clan, home, and roots. The Lion is the King of the Beasts, and Marie's soul is charged with that kind of energy -- not that he is so beastly! More that, like any good cat, he enjoys attention, at least from people he trusts. And nowhere is that more true than when sitting on his throne in his own "court." So what does this tell us about Marie's natural life-mate? Such a person is no slave or obsequious "yes-person" -- Marie's spirit is far too expansive to have anything less than another "regent" for a consort. But it does tell us that anyone who is going to share the long road with him is someone who is lavish with praise and support, who, like Marie, has a real appreciation for quality and style, and who is willing to make whatever sacrifices in other areas are necessary for making the home, and perhaps life together in general, into a place of magic and light.
Another piece of the puzzle when it comes to these feelings of having deep roots together is the Fourth House -- the traditional "House of the Home." One way of getting perspective on this part of the chart is to discover which planet rules its cusp. At the moment of Marie's birth, Sagittarius was on the Fourth House cusp, which makes Jupiter its ruler. And Jupiter is King among the Roman gods...although in many ways thinking of Santa Claus brings us closer to the real spirit of the planetary archetype. For Marie to feel comfortably committed to a home scene, it must have the kind of energy that would please old Saint Nick: generosity, playfulness, a sense of hope and possibility, and of course, laughter...and lots of it. This in turn implies that Marie's natural hearth-mate is a person with those same qualities: such a person doesn't possess a mean-spirited bone, believes deeply and unambiguously in Marie himself, and enjoys a good giggle...and probably a good meal too. This lightness of spirit isn't to be mistaken for shallowness; Jupiter is philosophical and idealistic, but in this case the philosophies and ideals involve a deep faith in the "rightness" -- and joys -- of domestic life, and a spirit of merry gratitude toward Marie for helping to bring those ideals into manifestation. His natural domestic partner isn't necessarily "up" all the time -- no one really can be -- but such an individual is not inclined toward brooding or undue psychological self-absorption, and instead takes a resilient, positive attitude toward life, grabs the moment and celebrates it, and is probably willing to call the friends, roll back the living room rug, and dance 'til dawn.
When Marie was born, there were no planets in the Fourth House, so most of what we can learn about this part of Marie's life we already discovered a moment ago when we considered the sign on its cusp.
And with that we end our analysis of the astrological dimensions of the dance you are doing with your soulmates -- and with yourself as a result of contact with them! We thank you for letting us touch this very intimate part of your life, and hope that you've found the words and perspectives helpful.
One final note: this report is an abridged version of the much longer synastry report we've written called THE SKY WE SHARE. That report provides a similar analysis of two individuals, but also goes very deeply into comparing their charts and the "aspects" they make between themselves. It focuses on how well they "fit" each other's needs in every category, comparing their "natural mate" profiles, and generally tackling the much more complicated question of an actual human relationship rather than looking at one person alone, as we've done in these pages.
Even though we respect your ability to be happy without a mate, we imagine that since you've chosen to read this report, you might be open to the possibility of finding one!